Frequently-asked questions about senior care
For many families that must begin to think about care for their kupuna, navigating the road ahead is fraught with difficult decisions that can have big consequences. In our post, we outline seven very common questions that family members end up ask themselves throughout the process.
1. When does it make more sense to continue living at home vs. moving into a care facility?
Although it may seem safe and familiar, living at home is not always a good choice for an aging loved one.
If your kupuna at home is bored or sick, not physically or mentally engaged with activities, sleeps at inconsistent times, or doesn’t eat properly, then these issues can lead to physical and cognitive decline. Depression, dehydration, and malnourishment can creep up on seniors in subtle ways that can be difficult to spot if a senior lives at home unsupervised.
A structured environment with attentive supervision and scheduled activities can combat many of the above problems. Structure and routine are some of the best things about being in a facility.
Adult Day Care can also serve as a good middle ground, offering activities, meals, and supervision during the day while allowing seniors to continue living at home.
Conversely, it may be better to continue living at home if your kupuna (and/or you) wants to maintain control over the schedule and activities. Plus, in the time of COVID-19, some families may wish to dictate their own approach to care instead of adhering to facility restrictions and protocols. And cost-wise, it may make more sense to continue living at home if your kupuna does not need around-the-clock care or supervision.
With that said, if your loved one cannot safely be left alone for most of the day and night, then he or she should absolutely move into a senior care facility.
2. How do I talk to a senior who doesn’t want to talk about or refuses senior care?
Kūpuna may reject care because it represents an uncomfortable disruption to daily life. This is understandable! Change is hard. Many people are scared to leave a familiar environment and try something new. Children can struggle to transition into new schools; adults struggle to maintain new diets or exercise routines. And kūpuna regularly suffer from fatigue and pain that may make them even more reluctant to try something new.
Getting your kupuna to open his or her mind to senior care can (and often should) be a gradual process. Try to expose him or her to regular outings, such as going to the supermarket or out to dinner. Gradually increase the amount of time spent outside the home. You can then introduce your kupuna to lower-commitment senior care options such as Adult Day Care. As with exercise, it is much easier for your kupuna to take on unfamiliar activities by starting small and working up.
Kūpuna may also reject senior care due to misconceptions they have about care homes. Elderly care has historically been depicted in a depressing light. But today, many care facilities are well-kept, providing comfort, activities, and amenities for kūpuna who would benefit from the attention, social interaction, and daily assistance.
3. When is it time to change the type of care for my kupuna?
Everyone has different needs - not only for care, but also budget, proximity to loved ones, etc. If a facility is no longer providing value to you (that is, if it is not meeting your needs) then it is likely time to move.
This does not necessarily mean that the facility was always a bad fit. Care needs almost always change, and kūpuna require more supervision and assistance over time.
There are many senior care options in Hawaii, so you should not feel obligated to stay married to any single one. However, if you are considering a change in facility, you should begin looking immediately.If nothing else, looking will help to expand your options.Even if you don’t need to move right away, you should call up any potential candidates, explain your situation, and put yourself on their radar.
4. What are some common mistakes that families make?
Delaying care, which can lead to further physical/mental decline, necessitating even more expensive prices down the road
Letting kupuna stay at home too long/cutting corners by using technology to try to meet care needs at home
Staying too long at a facility that is not equipped to provide the right care
Choosing a facility that feels pleasant but is not equipped to provide the right care
Choosing a facility based on what you or your kupuna wants, rather than what your kupuna actually needs
Not knowing what differences there are between facilities, thereby limiting your options
Choosing a facility that is too big or too small for your loved one’s needs
Budgeting for the current situation, but not for future cost increases when care needs are higher
Do senior living facilities provide amenities such as meals, housekeeping, and laundry?
This can depend on the facility and the facility type. The majority of independent living facilities do not provide these amenities. However, the more intensive care facilities -- such as Assisted Living Facilities, care homes, foster homes, and nursing homes -- generally provide these amenities. Always check with a facility on what amenities are provided.
If I reach a point where I can no longer afford care services for my kupuna, what can I do?
All adult foster homes, some care homes, and some nursing facilities accept residents dependent on Medicaid. However, you should budget far in advance so that you can anticipate future costs.
If you know your loved one will need to transition to payment via Medicaid in 2-3 years, go to a facility that accepts Medicaid, pay privately, then transition into Medicaid. Work with a case management agency in order to plan for care that’s reimbursed by Medicaid.
Do I need to start looking into nursing services for my loved one?
Assistance with daily activities such as walking, feeding, and bathing generally do not require nursing services, even if the amount is intensive. Some people live their entire lives without having to transfer to a nursing facility.
But if your loved one suffers from any chronic medical conditions, you should consider a facility that provides nursing services. Certain procedures must be conducted by licensed medical personnel, such as administering tube-feeding, certain types of catheters, injections, and IVs. Additionally, nursing services may be necessary for anyone with a medical condition that needs to be monitored closely for change in status.